Thursday, February 19, 2009
TRH Updates - The Pause
This might be the longest I've gone without blogging. Over the past two weeks, I've been tumbled upon by side effects and started to slowly weaning myself down in terms of the prednisone dosage. Hopefully, the world will open up now that I'm not taking as much medicine but the sadness persists regardless. For the most part, I'm finding it hard just to leave my house in the morning. This week was particularly difficult. I've done a lot of crying in my cubicle. It's not normal -- I realize that -- it's all the meds, but it doesn't make the day-to-day any easier. So I've been keeping quiet. I suppose no one wants to hear over and over again how miserable I am in my head. To the outside world, things are grand: work is fine, house is coming along swimmingly, RRHB is well, and the disease isn't killing me at the moment. To the inside world, it's a different story: there's panic welled up inside at the thought of leaving the house, all of television is making me bored, and the billows of depression seem to well up like a Greek tragedy threatening to overtake me entirely. Thankfully, the waves haven't swept me away just yet.